I became a Christian at 13. I was pretty devout until the age of 17 when I decided that my will was better than God’s.  Brilliant, I know.  But, the point is, I have known the basic concepts of Christianity for a long, long time. 

As an adult, I’ve been wishy washy, trying to move back towards God, but not quite ever getting there.  I’ve done Bible studies and sometimes I even get up early and read the Bible on my own.  But on a typical day, by 9 am, I have already forgotten about Christ and anything I read that morning.  I believe, but I haven’t been able to live it very well.  It has been really frustrating.   And, honestly, I haven’t been able to figure out how people are staying close to God in their day to day lives unless they are working in the church or something. Finally, I came to the conclusion that maybe I am just not the church” type.”

Until now.

I really believe that by stepping out and declaring my faith, getting out of my comfort zone, and being obedient, God is showing me things I could never see or understand before now.

One of the things I am learning is that the little things, the things I glossed over as not really crucial to being a Christian, are actually really, really important.  These “little things” add up are what keep me close to God. 

Over the years, I have spent a lot of time concentrating on two big things and ignoring the little things.  The first big thing I relied upon is believing.  You have to believe to get to Heaven and to understand the bible, so you pretty much better get that accomplished.  Big thing number 2 was something along the lines of trying to be a good person or trying to be nice to others.  You don’t necessarily “need” that to get to Heaven, but it was kind of my proof that I was a Christian.  “Hey, I believe AND I am really nice.”

The philosophy was that I have the two big things down, so I am leading a Christian life.  Right?  Well, yes, I guess so.  But the real truth, I am discovering, is that all the little things are what really connect me to Christ.  Things I would have glossed over before as unimportant, I now see in a different light.  Minute by minute, hour by hour, I am either building my faith or not.  So, the little things that I can carry with me each and every hour, matter.  They matter a lot because minute by minute, hour by hour, I need reminders.

Today’s post relates to this.  I actually debated whether I should write it or not.  Really, how important is this topic?  Do I really need to do it?  Is this small change really going to make any difference?  Shouldn’t I focus on something else that is maybe more important?  But it has been on my heart, it’s on my “list,” and in my reading last night I was convicted by a verse. 

The list refers to my original list of things I wanted to challenge myself with.  I still have many things on that list yet to do.  Even though I have this list, I still pray and ask God to give me the right words on the right day.  And, he has been faithful.  I am constantly being convicted, being shown a verse, or just having a day to day experience that is leading me to what should be written on that day.  Today is no exception.

Last night in my reading, I came across this verse.   “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen.”  Ephesians 4:29

This verse relates to various topics, I realize, but today I am tackling cussing. 

Soooo…..I am not sure when the F-bomb became an acceptable word to use as needed in conversations, but it certainly has. A week ago, I had to have my car towed which gave me the opportunity to “hang out” with a complete stranger in the close quarters of a tow truck for 45 minutes.  That’s always an awkward situation.  I mean, really, what am I going to talk to the tow truck driver about?  40 year old women and tow truck drivers do not generally have a lot in common.   But, I decided to make the most of it and chat it up with this little guy. 

He was nice enough.   We talked about his trucks, his work schedule, and his second job.  Typical conversation.  But what struck me, more than anything, is that he did not know me at all and felt no hesitation in using the f-word as a descriptor whenever necessary.    

Now, let’s be clear.  Remember, I write this stuff to convict myself.  So, the fact that I am writing this is proof that I actually use the f-bomb and other 4 letter words as well.  I am not proud of it, I don’t do it a lot, but that’s what this is all about; asking myself, what I am doing on a day to day basis that isn’t bringing glory to God. 

In that moment it struck me how, the f-word in particular, has become pretty accepted.  We even have abbreviations for it so that we can use it more often.   “That’s effing ridiculous,”  for example.

Well, I’ll tell you what I think is riduculous; the fact that I have grown numb to that word and just accept it as ok to use.  Meanwhile, I hesitate when talking about Christ.  Now, that is messed up.  It’s ok to say the f-word but not bring up the bible?  You are weird if you put your hands up in church out of joy and excitement for your faith, but not weird when you throw the f-bomb around?

And, I know I probably sound like a prude, but let’s be real.  It’s a pretty bad word, isn’t it?  I’m pretty confident that when that word comes out of my mouth, no one is seeing Christ in me.  No one thinks, “I bet she is a Christian” Or “man she is so full of joy, I really want some of what she has got.”  Really?  Yeah, no. 

For some reason this has not seemed like a big deal to me.  I mean, it’s not like it’s really hurting anyone.  It’s not a sin against anyone.  It’s just a bad habit, right?

But, you know what, it is a big deal.  It’s just one more thing, one more little way that Satan keeps a hold of me.  It’s one more little thing he convinces me is ok.  It’s one more way I choose Satan over Christ.  Ouch! 

If my job is to be like Christ, I’m going to be hard pressed to find any instances in the bible where Christ uses profanity. 

In addition, there are enough sins that I struggle with that I will have trouble controlling, judging others, selfishness, and gossiping to name a few.  Those are hard.  But, being obedient and not cursing so that Christ isn’t portrayed in a poor light, well, that’s low hanging fruit as my friend Lisa said this morning.  So, I’m just going to knock this little thing out today!